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Monday, April 11, 2016

Three Ways to Continue Character Building at Home


Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, the summer is nearly upon us.  There are only a few weeks until graduation.  Once school is out for the summer many of the normal operations of the campus will stop.  The constant buzz and energy of students in the halls will dissipate, and the cheerful voices of our teachers will be noticeably absent.  But not all of the good things have to stop for the summer.
We’ve placed a lot of effort this school year on the idea of character building.  It goes into the planning for nearly everything we do.  But character building is something that needs to be thought about over the summer, too.  Parents, here are a few very simple things you can do to help your child develop even further while they are home over the summer.
1. Family Service
Our kids take their cues from us.  They learn what acceptable living looks like by watching us.  And while they may not see the many hours of work that you are putting into serving your own family, it’s important for them to see you serving others.
One great way to work along-side your kids in service is to survey your neighborhood and find a person or family who needs help with something.  Maybe it’s adopting a widow who needs her lawn mowed. Fathers, that’s a great service for you to do with your child.  Find a way to get outside of your normal comfort zone and show someone love, and make sure your kids are along for the ride.  Choosing to do service that has no measurable payback is humbling, and it’s the very heart of Christianity.
2. Talk About the Hard Stuff
Americans have worked long and hard to push discomfort into extinction.  The sad part about that is, our kids often suffer from our choices to not talk about the hard stuff.  Either we don’t want to make them uncomfortable or we don’t want the awkwardness, but either way our kids suffer when we don’t address the tough stuff.
Make a point of talking about the hard stuff this summer.  Address the issues that have been lingering.  Is your child struggling with honesty?  Make this the summer of clarity on how dishonesty hurts him/her, you as a parent, and God as their heavenly father.  Do you have a child who is reaching puberty?  Just talk about it.  Is your high schooler dabbling in areas that they shouldn’t be?  Don’t let it go on.  Make this the summer of talk.  Good comes from shining light in the darkness.
Stepping up to the plate and doing the hard things will set a fantastic example for your children.  They will see your example and know that you love them, but they will also see that discomfort isn’t a bad thing.
3. Create ceremonies
There’s nothing wrong with making a big deal out of otherwise normal events.  Find a way to create ceremonies for your kids this summer, and make a big deal out of it!
The whole idea is to let your kids know that their development is important to you.  There are a lot of different ways to celebrate your child, but we’re focusing on character development, so here are two examples.
Milestone Celebrations
You may identify key ages at 5 (when the start Kindergarten), 10 (around puberty), 16 (when they get driver’s license), 18 (graduate high school) as appropriate times to have ceremonies that remind your child about the importance of their new responsibilities as well as the excitement that is to come.  Include other people in these events who are influential in your child’s development, and ask them to take part in the ceremony by sharing blessings or advice.  This creates an opportunity for you as the parent to open up the line of communication and to pour truth into their hearts.
Character Celebrations
Keep your eyes open for opportunities to celebrate your children when they make great decisions that exhibit character.  Did your kiddo choose to tell the truth even when it was very hard to do?  Did your child choose to give his/her last piece of candy to someone else?  Did your high schooler make the decision to not go with his/her friends to a place they shouldn’t? Show them how important that is.  Celebrate character growth at every turn. Whether it’s ice cream on the way home, or a nighttime bonfire event with friends, our kids should know how important good character is.